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  BONE DEEP

  KIM O′BRIEN

  © 2015 Kim O’Brien

  Sale of the paperback edition of this book without its cover is unauthorized.

  Spencer Hill Press

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever.

  Contact: Spencer Hill Press, PO Box 243, Marlborough, CT, 06447

  Please visit our website at www.spencerhillpress.com

  First Edition: April 2015

  Kim O’Brien

  Bone Deep/by Kim O’Brien–1st ed.

  p. cm.

  Summary: When a teen girl must visit her father for the summer, things look up when she meets two hot young men, but take a turn for the worse when her best friend vanishes.

  The author acknowledges the copyrighted or trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this fiction: Amazon, AP/Advanced Placement, Barbie, Bing, Cheerios, CNN, Coke, Columbia University, Diet Coke, Domino’s, Doritos, Dr. Pepper, Dr. Seuss, Expedition, Google, Harvard, Home Depot, Honey Nut Cheerios, Igloo, Indiana Jones, Ivy League, Jack in the Box, Jeep, JELL-O, Jimmy Eat World, Kool-Aid, Life Flight, Listerine, Marriott, Neosporin, Nike, Pendleton, Popsicle, Pottery Barn, Princeton University, Prius, PSAT, Red Sox, Rutgers, SAT, Scope, Skittles, Snow White, Starbucks, Stouffer’s, Tide, Timex, Tropicana, Urban Outfitters, Velcro, Vera Bradley, Vick’s VapoRub, Victoria’s Secret, Walmart, Weber, Wrangler, Yamaha (keyboard), Yankees

  Cover design by Christa Holland (Paper & Sage Design)

  Interior layout by Errick A. Nunnally

  978-1-63392-002-6 (paperback)

  978-1-63392-003-3 (e-book)

  Printed in the United States of America

  For my family—near and far—I love you all. We may march to a different beat, but I know we will always be there for each other.

  ONE

  Paige

  When I was a little girl, I loved playing hide-and-seek in the earthy hollows of pit houses and dark crannies of the rock caves where ancient American Indians once lived. I knew my father was fascinated with these places and that he liked finding things. I liked him finding me.

  Later, I wanted to be like him. I spent hours beneath a blazing desert sun carefully excavating my Barbies from their shallow graves in the dry, clay earth. I even dismembered a few to make their plastic limbs more like bones that could be painstakingly cleaned and pieced together.

  I believed the stories my father told in the light of the campfire, about the people whose ruins he restored. I remember the smell of smoke in the night as he talked about the existence of multiple worlds and how people traveled through them and became transformed along the journey. Somehow, I always imagined these worlds separated by a curtain as thick and black as the ones on our elementary school stage. The ones actors used to exit the stage, but sometimes couldn’t find the overlap and spent long seconds desperately groping the material before they finally managed to vanish.

  A year ago, the curtains in my life parted a little, and I saw into a world that existed between my parents—a world defined by whispers as sharp as broken glass and the doors that slammed like shouts. I learned what a marriage looked like when two people hated each other enough to methodically shatter their world—and me in the process.

  I had thought it was always better to know the truth.

  I was wrong.

  “She’s something, isn’t she?” My father mops his face with a bandanna. The armpits of his green, official park shirt are ringed with sweat.

  We are standing at the base of the ruins of an ancient Native American dwelling built into a limestone cliff. It has taken us about a half-hour to climb the ladders to get up here, and both of us are soaked with sweat and slightly out of breath. There’s not even a puff of wind, and the sun on my shoulders feels hotter than the lasers we created with magnifying glasses in Mr. Zimmerman’s pre-AP physics class.

  “She?” I lift my brows and ignore the deeper lines around his eyes that weren’t there six months ago. He’s thinner now, and more deeply tanned than I have ever seen him.

  “If a ship can be feminine, so can these ruins.” He adjusts a battered Indiana Jones-style hat on his sweat-stained head. “So what do you think, honey? Was it worth the climb?”

  “Sure, Dad.”

  He tries to read my face to see if I’m being sarcastic, but my sunglasses hide my eyes. After a moment, his gaze returns to the cracked plaster walls. The custody arrangement says I have to spend the summer in Arizona with him. It doesn’t say I have to like it.

  “This is where it happened, Paige.” My father walks toward the ruins. They remind me of a giant sandcastle, which are doomed things to begin with. This one, with its thick masonry walls and empty, blackened windows, is no exception.

  “Hundreds of prehistoric American Indians—an entire civilization—disappeared. They left so suddenly that there was still food on the table. To this day, no one knows what happened.”

  His voice lowers, and he gestures to the ruins. “Think about it. The people here invested hundreds of years in this place, building these homes, learning how to farm the desert, and then, overnight, they vanished.”

  The irony of what he’s just said makes me laugh. I mean, it’s so exactly what he did to me and Mom. He pretty much disappeared.

  He frowns. “What’s so funny?”

  My father—the famous archaeologist—doesn’t see it, just doesn’t get it. And so I let my face go blank and say, “Nothing.”

  He takes a swig of water from a canteen, wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, and then shakes his head as if I am impossible to understand.

  The truth is that he could make the connection if he tried. But that’s the problem. He wants to pretend that everything between us is okay. To admit something is wrong might mean he’d have to do something about it.

  “Come on,” he says, “I’ll show you around.”

  He leads me into the ruins through a T-shaped entranceway so narrow he has to turn sideways to get inside. Small bits of sticks and mud poke out of the plaster walls like plants desperately trying to grow in bad soil.

  The chamber inside is much smaller, darker than I imagined. The walls are blackened like the inside of a chimney, and they smell smoky.

  “Careful, Paige,” my father warns, pointing out a hole in the floor the size of a manhole. When I peer into the dark opening, I see the pale stubs of a ladder reaching up like a pair of hands.

  “What’s down there?”

  “Another chamber. I’ll show it to you another time.”

  He gestures me forward to the ladder leaning at a sharp angle against the blackened wall and then pauses to show me traces of fingerprints. They look fragile, like smudges of breath on a bathroom mirror. As I move closer to inspect them, my father places a hand on my shoulder.

  “Careful. The oils from your skin…”

  “…could damage them. I know.” I twist out of his touch.

  Part of me wants to remind him that I could read a petroglyph before I could read Dr. Seuss’s The Cat in the Hat. He’s forgotten this, however, and I don’t know which is worse. That he doesn’t remember who I was or that he has no idea of who I am.

  The third level is as dark and gloomy as the second. We enter through a hole in the floor about two feet deep and weave our way through a narrow, stone corridor with a wooden plank floor and a rusted handrail bolted to the limestone wall.

  The handrails, my father explains, were installed in the first half of the twentieth ce
ntury when the ruins were open to the public. He strokes the blackened railing. “We’re going to take all those out and restore this girl to her original glory.”

  His face has a dreamy expression, as if he’s imagining what these soot-blackened rooms will look like when he’s finished. I want to tell him that these dark, abandoned ruins will always be empty. And no matter what traces of the present he removes, it won’t change that the people who lived here are gone and he can’t bring them back.

  My father prompts me forward, and we retreat into the shadows of small, low-ceilinged rooms filled with odd assortments of crude stone tables and broken pieces of pottery scattered about like rejects at a tag sale.

  We climb higher, through another dark hole scabby with stones and even narrower than the others. The fourth level of the dwelling is a cavernous room that extends well back into the deepening shadows. The high ceiling is as sharp and jagged as coral. The side walls are scraped smooth.

  Voices drift toward us. In the soft glow of lantern light, I see people clustered along the back wall. There are two distinct groups. One consists of Native Americans dressed in beat-up, baggy jeans and plaster-splattered T-shirts; the other group wears tan shorts and green park polos like my father’s.

  The voices and work stop as my father and I get closer. “Hey, everyone,” he says, and then puts his arm around me. “I want you to meet my daughter, Paige.”

  All eyes turn to me. My muscles go tight as he squeezes my shoulder as if he cares about me. As if today is not the first time I’ve seen him in six months. As if everything between us is okay. I want to shrug off his arm, but I don’t. I guess it’s okay to hate your father but not want to embarrass him.

  “Your father has told us so much about you,” a tall, massively built man with long black hair and a face that looks chiseled from stone extends his hand.

  “This is my foreman, John Yazzi,” my father says and releases me so I can shake hands.

  The next person I meet is a short, muscular man with a broken front tooth and an impossibly thin braid that hangs to the middle of his back. His deeply calloused palms make his skin feel like leather. “Welcome. I am Jacob Begay.” His voice carries a Southwestern cadence.

  “And this is Jalen,” my father continues. “John’s son.”

  He’s tall, not quite as tall as his father, but enough so that my head comes only to his shoulder. He’s about my age, with deep-set black eyes, light-brown skin, and shiny black hair tied in a ponytail. His cheekbones are high, his nose straight, and his lips so full and perfect it’s hard not to stare, but my father already has gone on with the introductions. I shake the hand of another dark-haired boy without ever hearing his name.

  My father continues introducing me, but their names slip past me. I steal another glimpse of Jalen and feel the sudden heat in my face when he catches me.

  “And this is someone who doesn’t need an introduction,” my father says. Even without seeing his face, I hear the triumph in his voice.

  My heart stops as a tall, deeply tanned blonde wearing a sage-green Arizona SciTech tank and a pair of black Nike shorts steps forward.

  “Hi, Paige,” she says, smiling.

  A rush of joy shoots through me, followed by a stab of something else. She is part of every happy childhood memory I have and some that I’ve worked hard to forget. For a moment all I can do is stand there staring. And then, as the silence turns awkward, I say, “Emily?”

  TWO

  Paige

  Emily steps forward and hugs me hard. “I know,” she says, “isn’t this crazy?”

  We look at each other. She’s much taller than me now, and the small gap between her front teeth is gone. Her thick blonde braid, and those green eyes with the gold speckles, are exactly the same. She’s curvy now, and it feels weird to hug her.

  “I can’t believe you’re here. Why didn’t you guys tell me?”

  Emily exchanges a sideways glance with my father. “We wanted to surprise you.”

  “I almost blew it when you asked about her last night,” my father admits.

  “You said I might run into her, but…” I shake my head, trying to decide if I am happy or angry that they’ve blindsided me. I clench my hands into fists and will my face to go blank.

  Emily sees me struggle, and her face softens. “Oh, Paige,” she murmurs. “I’m so happy to see you, too.”

  My father chuckles. “I thought you’d be pleased.” He turns to Emily. “Why don’t you take a break? I’m sure you and Paige have a lot of catching up to do.”

  “Thanks, Dr. Duke.” Emily pushes a strand of hair behind her ear. “Let’s go before he changes his mind.” She slants a grin at my dad. “He’s a total slave driver.”

  My dad rolls his eyes as Emily grabs my hand, urging me to hurry. I follow her down the ladder and through the dark passages to a small recess in the wall in one of the chambers on the third floor. The nook is so cleverly designed that it blends perfectly, almost invisible. At one time, I suppose it was a sleeping chamber.

  “We can talk here.” Emily presses herself deep into the crevice. It’s small and barely fits the two of us. “So you were surprised. I wasn’t sure your dad was going to be able to keep it secret. He’s been really excited about you coming.”

  I lean back against the wall, remembering how he’d tried to hug me back at the airport and the conversations I’ve shut down. I know he’s trying, but it doesn’t make up for what he did.

  “I was surprised,” I admit. “You’re, like, a foot taller.”

  She laughs. “My parents were beginning to wonder if I was ever going to stop growing. Fortunately, five-foot-ten was the magic number.”

  It gives her four inches of height over me, making her somehow seem older, although she’s seventeen, the same age as me.

  “So you’re interning for my father?”

  Emily nods. A pleased, slightly shy smile crosses her face. “I’m blogging for the park website. I’m so excited about it—and it’s all because of your dad. Technically I’m underage, but your dad talked Dr. Shum into making an exception.”

  Oh. So that’s why she’s here. It makes sense. My father and Emily’s are best friends. Dr. Linton works for Arizona SciTech, and he pretty much got my father this job—a fact that makes my mother hate him and his name unspeakable in our house. To thank Dr. Linton, my dad probably pulled some strings for Emily. I wonder if Emily knows, and if she does, if it matters to her.

  I realize I’ve been silent too long. “So, you blog. You were always a good writer.”

  “But you’ve always had the better imagination.”

  I wrinkle my nose and try not to think just where my great imagination led us. “Not really,” I tell her.

  She smiles, draws her knees closer to her chest. “Well, fortunately I don’t have to make anything up. I basically interview people and then blog about it. As long as it makes the park look good, I can write anything.” Her face lights up. “The ruins are so cool—you’ll like it here, Paige. I know it.”

  “I don’t know. I’m still at the ‘Paige-don’t-touch-anything’ stage.”

  She laughs. “He’ll soften—I know he will. And then he’ll probably assign you to one of the research projects. The grad students are studying everything from the DNA in bat guano to…” She pauses to use her fingers like quotation marks. “A palynological interpretation of plant utilization.”

  “Wow,” I say in a tone of voice that means the exact opposite. “I can hardly wait.”

  Emily studies my face. “I know your parents’ divorce totally sucked. I’m sorry. I was going to email you, but I didn’t know what to say. It’d been so long. And then, when I knew you were coming here, I was afraid I’d give away the surprise. You are happy to see me, aren’t you?”

  A note of doubt creeps into her voice, and I realize that I don’t want to put her in the middle of the war between me and my father. Besides, under the jet lag, the fatigue, and the stress of being around him, I am happy to
see her.

  “Of course I’m happy.” I give her a smile, my first real one since I arrived. “I just don’t want to talk about the divorce.” But inside, I can’t help but wonder what my father told her. If, in his version, he’s the hero, and my mother was the villain who was always complaining about his hours at Rutgers, the family dinners he missed, the female students who always clustered after hours in his office.

  “You don’t have to talk about it, but if you ever want to, I’ll listen.”

  “Thanks.”

  She leans forward a little so our shoulders touch. “Tell me everything. Tell me about New Jersey.”

  I’m telling her about the Round Rock Crusaders, my high school soccer team (which lost every game last season), when my father and another man step into view. They don’t even glance in our direction; we’re probably lost in the shadows. Emily and I look at each other and wordlessly press ourselves deeper into the crevice.

  “The 3-D images from Chamber 17 are amazing,” the other man says. He’s lean, muscular, about my father’s age, and wearing the same green polo shirt and tan shorts. “Duke, you can see right into the wall…”

  “Who is that?” I whisper.

  “Dr. Raymund Shum,” Emily says so softly I can barely hear her. “Your father’s boss and the head of this whole thing.”

  “I’d love to see them, Ray,” my father says. “Do you have all the pictures you need before we start removing the railing?”

  Dr. Shum nods. “Yes, and Julia’s coming along on the backdrops for the exhibit. One thing—when you expose the plaster, make sure you take samples from the holes. Better yet, I want to be there. We may even be able to bore a little more deeply into the limestone.”

  The conversation turns geological, something that I once might have found interesting, but now couldn’t care less about. More important is the opportunity to study my father without him knowing it.

  There’s something different about him, more than the weight he’s lost or the dark tan. There’s a looseness about his body posture, an easy way he’s standing as if he’s more comfortable in these broken ruins than he ever was in our house. He laughs at something Dr. Shum says, and I realize it’s been a long time since I heard that sound.